How I’m trying to be like a man right now

Does anybody else have Mommy ADD?  Even though my boys are more self-sufficient than they used to be, I can’t seem to make a straight line from the kitchen to my bedroom without getting distracted.  I’ve found this to be true in my writing, meal planning, homework helping, and hold on, I need to wipe off the counter and start a load of laundry …

 

Sidetracked by laundry.

I’m trying something called “Right Now.”  It’s an intentional focus of what I’m doing.  You’ve heard men are file cabinets, and women are computers?  Men focus well on one thing and are not distracted by the chaos surrounding it.  Did you ever witness your husband pour into a televised football game while the children are simultaneously throwing a temper tantrum and destroying the Tupperware drawer? That’s file cabinet TV watching.  Meanwhile, we computers are mitigating that tantrum, maneuvering around the plastic lids, making dinner, and responding to texts all at the same time.  Multiprocessors.

 

The house could be on fire and these guys wouldn’t notice.

As honorable as that sounds, my multi-tasking skills are horrendous. I’m ineffective, loose-ended, and I end up cranky.

 

I’m attempting to turn this pattern around.  I’m concentrating on tackling chores like a man.  Pull the file out, focus on it, and put it back.  Next Right Now.

 

Without mindfully practicing this, I fail my people, and myself.

 

Last night, I asked my husband, Mr. Poppins, a simple question.  As he was responding (to me, remember!), I turned to my son and asked him to get me something.  Then I said, “Oh, wait, you were in the middle of a conversation with Dad.  How rude of me.  Never mind, I’ll get it.”  Upon returning, Mr. Poppins mercifully reminded me it was MY question he was responding to.  #RightNowFail

 

I’m successful at Right Now exercising.  Right Now I’m running.  Swimming.  Teaching a class.  Lifting.  Practicing yoga.  Beginning, middle, end, and I’m done.  I can check it off.  Maybe that’s why I feel so accomplished each time?

 

Running for a sense of accomplishment … and sanity.

Have you heard of yoga’s Tree pose?  You stand on one leg, while the other foot is resting on the thigh or calf.  It looks like this:

 

Tree pose in the trees. You can’t take a more cheesy picture.

 

When performed in a class setting, you’ll hear the instructor say something like, “To help balance, focus on one object in front of you. Allow everything else to fade into the background.”  Even though our feet quiver, our ankles fight to support our body, and our hips wobble, keeping our eyes on one element helps us stay upright.

 

In Tree pose, I’m trying not to fall over.  My eyes stay in one place and my mind doesn’t wander to the storm in my foot.

 

The storm in my foot as I balance.

(Also, bare toes don’t care. Don’t judge. I’ll get some color on them soon.)

 

Our never-ending demands are similar to the tornadic activity in our feet, ankles, and hips.  

 

Any given school morning, I’m trying to make breakfast for myself, make lunch for my kids, read emails, add to my grocery list, ignore the dog’s passive-aggressive plea for food, respond to any texts, prep for my fitness classes, and change out of my pajamas.  All this action is like the tendons, ligaments, and muscles fighting in a balance pose.

 

Our technological world enables us to multi-task to the nth degree.  Many of these advancements are helpful, but I’ve noticed they end up making me feel more frazzled.  Why work on ten things at once if nothing gets done?

 

Focus.

 

I’ve found when I identify exactly what I’m working on, and do it, I feel lighter when I’ve completed it.

 

Right now I’m finishing this piece.  Next, I will make breakfast.  Later, I will edit. I’m trying to approach my days with more single intention in the hopes I achieve, and feel, more completion.

 

My mommy ADD brain will never completely shut off.  At times it’s beneficial.  But maybe I need to take a lesson from the three men in my house and ignore the chaos of life’s minutia.  Who knows, I might actually get to enjoy watching an entire football game out of the practice.

 

Rooting on my Oklahoma State Cowboys – and focusing on it.

 

 

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